20 weeks |
Last week I shared that we were going to find out the sex of our baby and we found out that it's a boy. Chris and I had the names of our baby all planned out. If it was a boy his name was going to be Topher. So, everyone say hello to our son Topher.
I wanted to name our son Topher because it's unique and it fulfills Chris's name. Most people think Chris's name is Christopher but it's actually just Chris. So, I thought it would be nice for our son to fulfill his name; Chris-Topher. It has the meaning of our son fulfilling Chris. Also, Topher means bearer of Christ. Chris and I both want our son to grow up in the name of God and do what He has planned for his life.
The process of the ultrasound is quite boring for the mother. The dad gets to see everything but I'm lying down so I can't see anything until the nurse turns the screen. The most exciting part was finding out that we're having a baby boy. The snapshot of his little genitals was so funny and cute.
Chris was extremely happy but he wanted to make sure I was okay with us having a son because I expressed to him a few times that having a baby girl would be amazing. I knew that choice was out of our hands so I tried to set all my feelings aside and I believe it helped. When I found out we were having a boy I was genuinely happy. I just want our baby to be happy and healthy.
It made me even more happy to see Chris so excited to make great memories with our future son. He's always wanted to teach his son how to play ball, ride a bike, swim, and all the boy stuff. I'm really glad that he'll be able to do that with our son.
It hasn't hit me yet completely that my life is about to change completely. I'm sure I won't until our son comes into this world but each day I'm anticipating for motherhood even more. There's a part of me that's scared and wondering if I'm ready. The more I feel that way it leads me to God. All I can do is pray that God will lead me to be a great mom and a great wife. It's something we all go into not really knowing how to be a great parent. So, I know I'll need God to guide me through our new journey. I remember my sister once saying that my nephew wasn't her child. She said he was God's child and she was just taking care of him until the day Jesus came back for his children. So, she had to be a great shepard for my nephew. Those words stuck with me. That's how I see our son. Topher isn't our child. He is God's child and we're here to take care of him until God comes for all of us. Until then I will try to enjoy every step of the way. Even through the sleepless nights.
Love,
Sandy
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